AE-7 Map – 11 Audios – AE-7 Model – 33 Cases – 105 Cases – Book I
PC-11-B-En — “I Am Not Enough”
Exploration Through Personal Constellations
Exploration Through Personal Constellations in SPANISH >>>
In PC-11-En, we meet Nadia, 42, describing an experience that seems to extend across different areas of her life:
“I’M STUCK.”
She talks about:
HEALTH · WEIGHT · PROFESSIONAL CAREER · NUTRITION · EXERCISE · SELF-CARE
and about the difficulty of turning into action all the things she intellectually knows she should be doing.
Expressions such as these repeatedly appear in her language:
“I SHOULD.”
“I HAVE TO.”
“BY NOW, I SHOULD ALREADY…”
Through Reverse Engineering, Peter Crone later arrives at two particularly significant expressions:
“I AM NOT ENOUGH.”
and:
“I AM NOT FREE.”
Through the AE-7 Model, we have explored especially:
ADEQUACY
“AM I OKAY AS I AM?”
alongside another relevant territory:
POWER
CHOICE · FREEDOM · CAPACITY TO DECIDE
But now we are going to change perspective.
In PC-11-A-En, Family Constellations ask:
WHAT APPEARS WHEN NADIA OBSERVES HERSELF IN RELATION TO HER SYSTEM?
In PC-11-B-En, we turn our attention toward her own biography.
The question is:
WHICH AGES, VOICES, OR LIFE STAGES PARTICIPATE IN THE EXPERIENCE OF “I’M STUCK”?
And especially:
WHAT HAPPENS BETWEEN THE DIFFERENT AGES WHEN “I HAVE TO” APPEARS?
We do not know the answer.
Therefore:
WE ARE NOT LOOKING FOR “THE GIRL WHO IS NOT ENOUGH.”
WE ARE NOT LOOKING FOR THE AGE AT WHICH THE PROBLEM “ORIGINATED.”
WE ARE NOT LOOKING FOR A STORY THAT CONFIRMS OUR MAP.
We observe.
PERSONAL CONSTELLATIONS
Personal Constellations use representatives to explore different moments in a person’s own biography.
We might begin with the basic selection:
BABY · GIRL · ADOLESCENT · YOUNG WOMAN · ADULT WOMAN
or with only some of these stages, expanding later if the process justifies it.
We do not understand these ages as independent personalities.
Nor do we claim that there is necessarily any inner fragmentation.
We use them as:
PHENOMENOLOGICAL REPRESENTATIONS OF DIFFERENT MOMENTS IN ONE’S OWN HISTORY.
And we observe:
POSITION · ORIENTATION · GAZE · SENSATION · EMOTION · TENSION · MOVEMENT · WORD · SILENCE
We do not establish in advance what should appear.
FIRST, WE OBSERVE.
WE KNOW PART OF NADIA’S BIOGRAPHY
In this case, we have relevant biographical information.
Nadia grew up in the former Soviet Union.
From the age of six, she attended both regular school and music school at the same time.
She herself describes that experience as an:
“UNBEARABLE BURDEN.”
Much of those years was organized around:
STUDYING · PERFORMING · MEETING EXPECTATIONS · DOING THINGS WELL
She also remembers a mother who was frequently agitated and describes how she developed perfectionism in an attempt to be loved, accepted, and to avoid being yelled at.
Her brother, six years older, occupied the role in the family of:
“THE SMART ONE.”
Nadia also remembers a critical environment and a fear of being ridiculed or belittled.
All of this belongs to her history.
But knowing it does not mean knowing in advance:
HOW THAT HISTORY WILL APPEAR IN THE CONSTELLATION.
We do not place a six-year-old girl and decide:
“THIS IS WHERE ‘I AM NOT ENOUGH’ BEGAN.”
We do not claim:
“THE PRESSURE TO PERFORM PRODUCED HER PERFECTIONISM.”
Nor:
“HER MOTHER PRODUCED HER SELF-DEMAND.”
Nor:
“THE COMPARISON WITH HER BROTHER CREATED HER SENSE OF INSUFFICIENCY.”
Those events are part of the known biography.
The Personal Constellation allows us to observe:
HOW DIFFERENT MOMENTS OF THAT BIOGRAPHY RELATE TO ONE ANOTHER TODAY.
WE ARE NOT LOOKING FOR “THE GIRL WHO WAS NOT ENOUGH”
This principle is especially important in PC-11-En.
We do not begin by assuming that:
THE GIRL IS AFRAID.
THE ADOLESCENT IS EXHAUSTED.
THE YOUNG WOMAN NEEDS TO PROVE HERSELF.
THE ADULT WOMAN HAS TO FREE THEM.
All of this could appear.
Or it might not.
Nor do we assume that the stage that reacts most intensely is the one in which the experience originated.
Therefore, we work in the opposite direction:
WE PLACE
↓
WE OBSERVE
↓
WE LISTEN
↓
WE MAKE A MOVEMENT
↓
WE OBSERVE AGAIN.
THE INITIAL CONFIGURATION
We might begin, for example, with:
GIRL · ADOLESCENT · ADULT WOMAN
Not because we know that these three ages contain the problem.
They are simply three sufficiently differentiated moments from which to begin observing.
We could also begin with another configuration if the biography or previous work justifies it.
Once they are placed:
WE DO NOT ASK THEM TO REPRESENT OUR THEORY.
We observe.
Where is each one?
Where is each one looking?
What distance is there between them?
Does any of them want to move closer?
Does any want to move away?
Does one look for another?
Does one avoid contact?
Does tension appear?
Calm?
Tiredness?
Strength?
An impulse to move?
Does nothing particularly significant happen?
All of this is information.
IT IS NOT YET AN EXPLANATION.
WE LISTEN TO THE BODY BEFORE THE STORY
We can ask each representative:
“What do you notice standing there?”
Not:
“WHY DO YOU FEEL YOU ARE NOT ENOUGH?”
because she may not feel that way.
Not:
“WHO DEMANDED SO MUCH OF YOU?”
because we would be introducing an explanation.
Not:
“WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO PROVE?”
because she may not be trying to prove anything.
We simply ask:
WHAT DO YOU NOTICE?
There may be:
TENSION · CALM · HEAVINESS · LIGHTNESS · PRESSURE · STRENGTH · TIREDNESS · CLOSENESS · DISTANCE · AN IMPULSE TO MOVE
or something completely different.
An emotion may also arise spontaneously.
A word.
A phrase.
A movement.
Or silence.
We do not need to lead the representative from sensation toward an explanation.
WE ALLOW THE PHENOMENON TO EXPRESS ITSELF AS IT APPEARS.
WE INTRODUCE “I’M STUCK”
Once we have observed the initial configuration, we can introduce a representative for what Nadia recognizes before any interpretation:
“I’M STUCK.”
This point is important.
We do not begin by introducing:
“I AM NOT ENOUGH.”
Because that formulation appears later during the investigation.
“I’M STUCK” belongs to the experience Nadia brings.
So we place it.
And observe.
Does any age orient toward this representative?
Does any move closer?
Does any move away?
Does any change position?
Does tension appear?
Relief?
Familiarity?
Rejection?
Nothing particularly significant?
We do not ask:
“WHICH AGE PRODUCED THE STUCKNESS?”
We observe:
WHAT HAPPENS BETWEEN THE DIFFERENT AGES WHEN “I’M STUCK” ENTERS THE CONFIGURATION?
“I’M STUCK” AS THE THREAD OF THE EXPLORATION
From this point onward:
“I’M STUCK”
can accompany us throughout the Personal Constellation.
If one age changes position:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK”?
If two ages move closer:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK”?
If we introduce “I HAVE TO”:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK”?
If “I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING” appears:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK”?
If we later introduce “I AM NOT ENOUGH”:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK”?
We do not need to ask this question out loud every time.
It is our methodological reference as facilitators.
We observe whether there is a change in:
ITS POSITION · ITS DISTANCE · ITS ORIENTATION · ITS RELATIONSHIP WITH THE DIFFERENT AGES
and what happens in the configuration as a whole.
WHICH AGE REACTS?
“I’M STUCK” may produce a particularly clear reaction in one stage.
Perhaps the GIRL orients toward it.
Perhaps the ADOLESCENT moves away.
Perhaps the ADULT WOMAN remains very close.
Perhaps they all react.
Perhaps none of them reacts in a particularly significant way.
We do not need to immediately ask why.
We observe.
If we need to gather information from a representative:
“What do you notice there?”
A sensation may appear.
An emotion.
An impulse.
A movement.
A spontaneous word.
Or nothing particularly significant.
An age may react intensely to:
“I’M STUCK”
without that proving that the stuckness originated there.
Therefore, we distinguish between:
PARTICIPATING IN THE EXPERIENCE
and:
HAVING ORIGINATED IT.
Personal Constellations can show us which life stages currently participate in an experience.
By themselves, they do not demonstrate where it began.
WE MAKE A MOVEMENT
If one age appears particularly connected to “I’M STUCK,” we can make a small movement.
Not to correct her.
Not to make her stop being stuck.
Simply to obtain new information.
We can increase a distance.
Slightly change an orientation.
Allow a spontaneous movement.
Temporarily remove:
“I’M STUCK”
and observe.
What changes?
Does any age move?
Does relief appear?
Tension?
Does any representative look for the place “I’M STUCK” occupied?
Does the configuration remain almost unchanged?
Then we can reintroduce it.
And compare.
WE PLACE → WE OBSERVE → WE MOVE OR REMOVE IF APPROPRIATE → WE COMPARE → WE OBSERVE AGAIN.
WE INTRODUCE “I HAVE TO”
There is one experience that is especially present in PC-11-En:
“I HAVE TO.”
We also find:
“I SHOULD.”
and:
“BY NOW, I SHOULD ALREADY…”
These expressions are explicitly part of Nadia’s experience.
Therefore, after observing the initial configuration, it may be particularly useful to introduce a representative for:
“I HAVE TO.”
We place it.
And observe.
Which ages react?
Does any move closer?
Does any move away?
Does any seem to recognize it?
Does any change position?
Does tension appear?
Strength?
Tiredness?
Nothing particularly significant?
And we keep following our thread:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK” WHEN “I HAVE TO” APPEARS?
Does it move closer?
Farther away?
Does its orientation change?
Does one age remain between the two?
Does nothing change?
We do not need to ask:
“WHY DO YOU HAVE TO?”
Nor:
“WHAT DOES IT MEAN IF YOU DON’T DO IT?”
Nor:
“WHOSE ‘I HAVE TO’ IS THIS?”
Here we are not doing Reverse Engineering.
WE OBSERVE WHAT ITS PRESENCE PRODUCES IN THE CONFIGURATION.
“I HAVE TO” AS A SECOND THREAD OF THE EXPLORATION
In PC-11-En, it may be particularly interesting to maintain two reference points:
“I’M STUCK”
and:
“I HAVE TO.”
Not because we know that one causes the other.
We want precisely to observe what relationship appears between them.
We can bring them closer.
Move them farther apart.
Temporarily remove “I HAVE TO.”
Reintroduce it.
Change its position.
And observe:
What happens in the different ages?
What happens to “I’M STUCK”?
What happens when “I HAVE TO” temporarily disappears from the field?
Does one age relax?
Does another seem to lose orientation?
Does nothing change?
WE DO NOT DECIDE IN ADVANCE THAT “I HAVE TO” PRODUCES “I’M STUCK.”
We investigate it.
“I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING”
Later, we can introduce a contrast:
“I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING.”
Not as advice.
Not to tell Nadia that she should abandon her responsibilities.
Not to turn passivity into the solution.
We use it as a representative.
We place it.
And observe.
Which ages react?
Does any move closer?
Does any move away?
Does calm appear?
Discomfort?
Tension?
Rejection?
Attraction?
Indifference?
And especially:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK” WHEN “I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING” APPEARS?
We can also observe what happens to:
“I HAVE TO.”
We can remove one.
Introduce the other.
Compare.
“I HAVE TO” ↔ “I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING”
Not to decide which one is correct.
But to observe how each life stage responds to both possibilities.
WE DO NOT CONFUSE A REPRESENTATIVE WITH AN INTERVENTION PHRASE
Here it is important to maintain a distinction.
When we place:
“I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING”
we are using a representative.
It has a place in the configuration.
We can observe its position, orientation, distance, and relationship with the different ages.
Something different would be for a representative, at some point, to try saying:
“RIGHT NOW, I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING.”
That would be an intervention.
Not a representative.
The phrase is tested.
And we observe what happens.
A REPRESENTATIVE AND AN INTERVENTION PHRASE ARE NOT THE SAME THING.
WHAT HAPPENS WITH THE GIRL?
In this case, we know specific experiences from Nadia’s childhood.
From the age of six, she attended two schools at the same time.
She describes that stage as an:
“UNBEARABLE BURDEN.”
Therefore, if the GIRL shows a significant reaction to:
“I HAVE TO”
or:
“I’M STUCK”
we can stay there.
Not to say:
“WE HAVE FOUND THE ORIGIN.”
We let her remain there.
We observe.
We can move “I HAVE TO” closer or farther away.
We can temporarily remove it.
We can introduce “I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING.”
And observe what happens.
Perhaps tiredness appears.
Perhaps strength.
Perhaps relief.
Perhaps fear.
Perhaps none of these.
BIOGRAPHY GIVES US CONTEXT.
THE PHENOMENON SHOWS US WHAT IS HAPPENING NOW.
THE ADOLESCENT MAY SHOW A DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE
We do not assume that all ages react in the same way.
The ADOLESCENT may relate completely differently to:
“I HAVE TO”
“I’M STUCK”
or:
“I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING.”
Perhaps she moves closer where the girl moves away.
Perhaps strength appears where there was previously tiredness.
Perhaps she shows no reaction.
Perhaps this is precisely a stage in which certain capacities are already deeply developed.
We do not need to interpret immediately.
EACH LIFE STAGE MAY HAVE EXPERIENCED THE SAME STRATEGY DIFFERENTLY.
THE ADULT WOMAN IS ALSO PART OF THE CONSTELLATION
We do not use the ADULT WOMAN as the therapist of the other ages.
She does not necessarily come to:
RESCUE · PROTECT · INTEGRATE · EXPLAIN · REPAIR
the girl or the adolescent.
That could reproduce precisely:
“I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING.”
We observe the adult woman too.
What happens when she looks at “I HAVE TO”?
What happens in relation to “I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING”?
What happens in relation to “I’M STUCK”?
Perhaps the adult is the one most identified with obligation.
Perhaps another age shows greater freedom.
Perhaps the adult needs to receive something from an earlier stage.
Perhaps something completely different happens.
WE DO NOT KNOW THE DIRECTION OF THE MOVEMENT.
We discover it.
WE INTRODUCE “I AM NOT ENOUGH” ONLY LATER
Only later, if the process gives us reason to do so, can we introduce a representative for:
“I AM NOT ENOUGH.”
Now we are incorporating something different.
It is not the initial experience Nadia brings.
It is a conclusion that appears later during the exploration with Peter Crone and AE-7.
Therefore, we do not use it to explain in advance what is happening between the different ages.
We place it.
And observe.
Which ages react?
Does any move closer?
Does any move away?
Does familiarity appear?
Rejection?
Tension?
Indifference?
Does any age seem especially related to this representative?
None?
And we maintain our thread:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK” WHEN “I AM NOT ENOUGH” APPEARS?
We also observe:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I HAVE TO”?
Does any relationship appear between the three elements?
Does none appear?
We do not need to decide in advance that:
“I’M STUCK” = “I AM NOT ENOUGH.”
Nor that:
“I AM NOT ENOUGH” → “I HAVE TO.”
These relationships belong to the map we are investigating.
Not to a conclusion we should impose on the Constellation.
NADIA IS NOT “I AM NOT ENOUGH”
If the phenomenon allows it, we can test a differentiation.
The ADULT WOMAN can look at the representative of:
“I AM NOT ENOUGH”
and, if it makes sense at that moment, try saying:
“YOU ARE A CONCLUSION.”
Then:
“I AM NADIA.”
And we observe.
What happens in the adult woman?
What happens in the other ages?
What happens to “I AM NOT ENOUGH”?
What happens to “I HAVE TO”?
And, above all:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK”?
Perhaps something changes.
Perhaps not.
We are not trying to replace:
“I AM NOT ENOUGH”
with:
“I AM ENOUGH.”
We are not trying to install a new belief.
We are observing what happens when a conclusion can be seen as something different from the person.
“I AM NOT FREE”
In PC-11-En, another expression also appears:
“I AM NOT FREE.”
We do not need to introduce it automatically.
It may be useful if the configuration begins to show a particularly intense relationship between:
OBLIGATION · CHOICE · DESIRE · CAPACITY TO DECIDE
If there is sufficient reason, we place a representative for:
“I AM NOT FREE.”
And observe.
Which ages react?
What happens to “I HAVE TO”?
What happens to “I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING”?
What happens to “I AM NOT ENOUGH”?
And:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK”?
We do not decide whether “I AM NOT FREE” is a root, a consequence, or an independent territory.
That differentiation belongs to AE-7.
Here, we observe what place it occupies in the relationship between the different stages of the biography.
“I WANT TO” AND “I SHOULD”
Another particularly relevant contrast in PC-11-En may be:
I WANT TO
and:
I SHOULD.
Only if the process justifies it.
We place both as representatives.
And observe.
How does the GIRL respond to I WANT TO?
How does she respond to I SHOULD?
And the ADOLESCENT?
And the ADULT WOMAN?
Does any age move closer to one and farther away from the other?
Does any remain between the two?
Does any seem unable to distinguish them?
Does nothing particularly significant happen?
And we maintain our reference points:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I HAVE TO”?
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK”?
We do not assume:
I WANT TO = FREEDOM
nor:
I SHOULD = PRISON.
We want to observe how they actually appear in the configuration.
CHOICE
If the process leads toward this territory, we can introduce a representative for:
CHOICE.
Not because we have decided that POWER is the root.
We place it.
And observe.
Which ages react?
Does any move closer?
Does any step back?
Does calm appear?
Tension?
Uncertainty?
Strength?
Nothing?
And we observe:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I HAVE TO” WHEN CHOICE APPEARS?
And:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK”?
We are not trying to make “I’M STUCK” disappear.
Nor are we necessarily trying to make “I HAVE TO” lose all its strength.
We observe whether something changes when:
CHOOSING
is also represented.
FROM “I SHOULD” TO “I WANT TO”
In the original work, a particularly significant movement appears.
Nadia begins to differentiate between:
“I SHOULD GO FOR A WALK.”
and:
“I WANT TO GO FOR A WALK.”
Externally, the behavior may be the same.
But the internal experience can be very different.
In the Personal Constellation, we do not need to explain this difference.
We can represent it.
For example:
“I SHOULD”
and:
“I WANT TO.”
We place them.
And observe how the different ages relate to both.
Perhaps one age strongly orients toward “I SHOULD.”
Perhaps another can look toward “I WANT TO.”
Perhaps both expressions produce tension.
Perhaps neither is particularly significant.
And we continue observing:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK” IN EACH CONFIGURATION?
The same behavior may remain.
What may change is the place from which it arises.
REST
If, during the process, a significant relationship appears with doing, performing, meeting expectations, or stopping, we can introduce:
REST.
Not because we know Nadia has a problem resting.
We place it.
And observe.
Which ages react?
Does any want to move closer?
Does any move away?
Does calm appear?
Discomfort?
Guilt?
Tension?
Nothing?
What happens to:
“I HAVE TO”?
And to:
“I’M STUCK”?
We can also observe the relationship between:
REST
and:
“I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING.”
We do not assume they represent the same thing.
The configuration may show us differences that language does not reveal.
SUCCESS AND FAILURE
If the process justifies it, we can introduce representatives for:
SUCCESS
and:
FAILURE.
We do not assume Nadia needs success in order to feel she is enough.
Nor that FAILURE necessarily represents a threat.
We place them.
And observe.
Which ages react to SUCCESS?
Which ages react to FAILURE?
Does any move closer?
Does any move away?
What happens to “I AM NOT ENOUGH”?
What happens to “I HAVE TO”?
And especially:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK”?
We do not need to ask:
“WHAT DOES FAILING SAY ABOUT YOU?”
That question can be very useful in AE-7.
Here, we first allow the configuration to show what relationship exists, if any.
MY BODY
PC-11-En includes references to:
HEALTH · WEIGHT · NUTRITION · EXERCISE · SELF-CARE
Here we need to be especially careful.
We do not use Personal Constellations to claim:
THAT WEIGHT HAS AN EMOTIONAL CAUSE.
Nor:
THAT AN ILLNESS EXPRESSES A CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCE.
Nor:
THAT CHANGING THE CONFIGURATION WILL PRODUCE A MEDICAL CHANGE.
If relevant, we can introduce a representative for:
MY BODY.
Not to explain a symptom.
But to explore:
THE RELATIONSHIP OF NADIA’S DIFFERENT AGES WITH HER BODY.
We place it.
And observe.
How does the GIRL respond?
And the ADOLESCENT?
And the ADULT WOMAN?
Does closeness appear?
Distance?
Tension?
Care?
Rejection?
Something completely different?
And we maintain our thread:
WHAT HAPPENS BETWEEN “MY BODY” AND “I’M STUCK”?
We are not looking for a medical explanation.
We are observing a relationship.
WE INTRODUCE ONLY WHAT IS NECESSARY
Throughout PC-11-B-En, representatives such as the following might prove useful:
“I HAVE TO”
“I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING”
“I AM NOT ENOUGH”
“I AM NOT FREE”
I WANT TO
I SHOULD
CHOICE
REST
SUCCESS
FAILURE
MY BODY
LIFE
But:
WE DO NOT NEED TO REPRESENT ALL OF THEM.
Each element enters because something that has occurred during the Constellation makes it relevant to observe.
Not because it appears on our map.
If REST does not emerge:
WE DO NOT PLACE REST.
If SUCCESS and FAILURE do not become relevant:
WE DO NOT NEED THEM.
If “I AM NOT FREE” adds nothing new:
WE DO NOT NEED TO INTRODUCE IT.
The map can offer possibilities.
THE PHENOMENON GUIDES WHICH ONES WE EXPLORE.
THE ENCOUNTER BETWEEN DIFFERENT AGES
At some point, it may be useful to bring two representatives closer together.
For example:
ADULT WOMAN · GIRL
or:
ADULT WOMAN · ADOLESCENT
or any other combination that the process has made relevant.
We do not assume what one should say to the other.
First:
THEY LOOK AT EACH OTHER.
We observe.
Is there recognition?
Distance?
Tension?
A desire to move closer?
Rejection?
Indifference?
We can briefly ask:
“What do you notice there?”
And wait.
An emotion may appear.
A movement.
A word.
Silence.
Perhaps:
“I SEE YOU.”
Perhaps:
“I’M HERE NOW.”
Perhaps something completely different.
THE DIALOGUE EMERGES FROM THE ENCOUNTER.
We do not write it beforehand.
THE ADULT WOMAN DOES NOT COME TO FIX THE GIRL
This principle becomes especially important in PC-11-En.
If we place the ADULT WOMAN in front of the GIRL, we do not assume that she has to:
SAVE HER · REPAIR HER · PROTECT HER · INTEGRATE HER · TEACH HER SOMETHING
Because we could be reproducing precisely:
“I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING.”
Perhaps the adult woman has resources the girl did not have.
But it may also be that the adult woman continues to be deeply organized around:
I SHOULD · I HAVE TO · DOING IT WELL · PROVING MYSELF
Perhaps the girl shows something the adult woman has lost.
Perhaps one can simply look at the other.
Perhaps no particularly significant movement occurs.
WE DO NOT KNOW THE DIRECTION OF THE MOVEMENT.
We discover it.
WE DO NOT SEEK “INTEGRATION” AT ALL COSTS
The different ages do not need to end up:
IN A LINE
LOOKING IN THE SAME DIRECTION
AGREEING WITH ONE ANOTHER
or:
INTEGRATED INTO A PERFECT IMAGE.
It may be enough for:
a distance to change,
one age to be able to look at another,
“I HAVE TO” to occupy a different place,
“I’M STUCK” to change position,
the adult woman to move closer to CHOICE,
one age to remain in front of “I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING,”
or for something we had not anticipated to appear.
It may also be that very little changes.
That too is information.
WE DO NOT NEED TO PRODUCE A CORRECT ENDING.
WE DO NOT ELIMINATE CAPACITIES
PC-11-En contains something especially important.
Nadia has developed enormous capacities.
She may be:
STRONG · INTELLIGENT · DISCIPLINED · RESILIENT · CAPABLE · PERSEVERING
We do not need to turn these qualities into symptoms.
Nor try to eliminate them.
A capacity can be genuine and, at the same time, may have been used at certain moments as a strategy.
The question is not for Nadia to stop:
MAKING AN EFFORT · GROWING · LEARNING · WORKING · TAKING CARE OF HERSELF · HAVING GOALS
The distinction may appear between:
CAPACITY
and:
OBLIGATION.
Between:
“I CAN MAKE AN EFFORT.”
and:
“I HAVE TO MAKE AN EFFORT.”
Between:
“I WANT TO GROW.”
and:
“I HAVE TO BECOME SOMEONE BETTER.”
We do not need to teach this distinction to the representatives.
We can allow the configuration to show it.
LOOKING TOWARD LIFE
At some point, it may be useful to introduce a representative for:
LIFE.
Not because Nadia has to look forward.
Not because LIFE is the solution.
We place it.
And observe.
How do the different ages react?
Does any look toward LIFE?
Does any remain oriented toward “I HAVE TO”?
Does any remain beside “I’M STUCK”?
Can the ADULT WOMAN look toward LIFE?
Does she want to move closer?
Does interest appear?
Tension?
Distance?
Nothing particularly significant?
And we continue observing:
WHAT HAPPENS TO “I’M STUCK” WHEN LIFE APPEARS?
It may move.
It may not.
And a particularly interesting possibility may appear:
NADIA CAN LOOK TOWARD HER LIFE EVEN WHILE “I’M STUCK” REMAINS PRESENT.
We do not need to make one experience disappear before allowing another possibility to emerge.
WE RETURN TO “I’M STUCK”
Before finishing, we deliberately return to our starting point.
At the beginning, we introduced:
“I’M STUCK.”
Now we observe it again.
Is it in the same place?
Does it maintain the same orientation?
Is it at the same distance from the different ages?
Does any age now relate to it differently?
Does “I HAVE TO” still occupy the same place?
Has “I AM NOT ENOUGH” appeared as something relevant?
Has CHOICE changed anything?
Has LIFE produced any movement?
Does everything remain almost the same?
We do not need to make:
“I’M STUCK” DISAPPEAR.
The question is:
WHAT HAS CHANGED IN THE CONFIGURATION?
And also:
WHAT HAS NOT CHANGED?
A NEW EXPERIENCE
Only if the process genuinely leads there may phrases such as these appear:
“RIGHT NOW, I DON’T HAVE TO PROVE ANYTHING.”
“I CAN LISTEN TO WHAT I WANT.”
“I CAN CHOOSE.”
“I CAN TAKE ONE STEP WITHOUT NEEDING TO HAVE EVERYTHING FIGURED OUT.”
“I CAN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF WITHOUT NEEDING TO FIX WHO I AM.”
“I CAN LOOK AT MY LIFE EVEN IF A PART OF ME STILL FEELS STUCK.”
But these phrases are not conclusions Nadia has to learn.
They are not positive affirmations.
And they are not representatives.
They are possible movements.
We test them only if they make sense after what has been observed.
And then we look again at what happens.
We do not need to replace:
“I AM NOT ENOUGH”
with:
“I AM ENOUGH.”
Nor:
“I AM NOT FREE”
with:
“I AM FREE.”
Nor:
“I’M STUCK”
with:
“I’M NOT STUCK ANYMORE.”
The transformation may be more precise:
AN EXPERIENCE CAN REMAIN PRESENT WITHOUT HAVING TO ORGANIZE MY ENTIRE LIFE.
THE MOVEMENT OF PC-11-B-En
WE BEGIN
with some relevant ages:
GIRL · ADOLESCENT · ADULT WOMAN
↓
WE OBSERVE
POSITION · ORIENTATION · GAZE · SENSATION · EMOTION · TENSION · MOVEMENT · WORD · SILENCE
↓
WE LISTEN
without interpreting in advance
↓
WE INTRODUCE THE VISIBLE EXPERIENCE
representative of “I’M STUCK”
↓
WE OBSERVE
which ages react and how the configuration changes
↓
WE KEEP “I’M STUCK” AS THE THREAD OF THE EXPLORATION
↓
WE INTRODUCE, IF APPROPRIATE
representative of “I HAVE TO”
↓
WE OBSERVE
what happens in each age
and:
what happens to “I’M STUCK”
↓
WE CAN INTRODUCE A CONTRAST
“I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING”
↓
WE COMPARE
“I HAVE TO” ↔ “I DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING”
without deciding which one should be correct
↓
WE MAKE A MOVEMENT
we change a position · a distance · remove or introduce a representative · allow a spontaneous movement
↓
WE OBSERVE AGAIN
↓
WE INTRODUCE ONLY IF THE PHENOMENON JUSTIFIES IT
“I AM NOT ENOUGH” · “I AM NOT FREE” · I WANT TO · I SHOULD · CHOICE · REST · SUCCESS · FAILURE · MY BODY · LIFE
↓
WITH EACH NEW ELEMENT, WE OBSERVE
what changes in the different ages
and:
WHAT HAPPENS NOW TO “I’M STUCK”?
↓
WE ALLOW ENCOUNTERS BETWEEN AGES
only when the configuration makes them relevant
↓
WE RETURN TO THE STARTING POINT
“I’M STUCK”
↓
WE COMPARE
WHAT HAS CHANGED?
WHAT HAS NOT CHANGED?
WHAT NEW INFORMATION HAS APPEARED?
↓
THE PHENOMENON GUIDES THE NEXT STEP.
PC-11-B-En DOES NOT SEEK THE ORIGIN
This point deserves to be especially clear.
We know that Nadia experienced pressure, performance demands, comparison, and expectations from a very young age.
That is part of her biography.
But if the GIRL reacts intensely to:
“I HAVE TO”
we do not conclude:
“THAT IS WHERE IT ORIGINATED.”
If the ADOLESCENT reacts to:
“I AM NOT ENOUGH”
we do not conclude:
“THAT IS WHERE IT BECAME ESTABLISHED.”
If the ADULT WOMAN appears deeply connected to:
“I’M STUCK”
we do not conclude that the problem belongs only to the present.
Personal Constellations allow us to observe:
WHICH AGES, VOICES, OR LIFE STAGES PARTICIPATE IN THE CURRENT EXPERIENCE.
We may also have real historical information.
But:
PARTICIPATING IN AN EXPERIENCE DOES NOT PROVE THAT IT ORIGINATED THERE.
THREE PERSPECTIVES ON PC-11-En
PC-11-En — AE-7 MODEL
Question:
WHAT EMOTIONAL ARCHITECTURE IS ORGANIZING MY EXPERIENCE?
We begin with experiences such as:
“I’M STUCK.”
“I HAVE TO.”
“I SHOULD.”
and through Reverse Engineering we explore formulations such as:
“I AM NOT ENOUGH.”
and:
“I AM NOT FREE.”
The map guides us especially toward:
ADEQUACY · POWER
and allows us to investigate rules, strategies, emotions, meanings, and self-confirming loops.
But:
THE MAP DOES NOT DECIDE THE MEANING.
PC-11-A-En — FAMILY CONSTELLATIONS
Question:
WHAT APPEARS WHEN NADIA OBSERVES HERSELF IN RELATION TO HER SYSTEM?
We begin with:
NADIA · FATHER · MOTHER · representative of “I’M STUCK”
We are not trying to prove that the family produced:
“I AM NOT ENOUGH.”
Nor that self-demand is necessarily inherited.
WE PLACE · WE OBSERVE · WE MAKE A MOVEMENT · WE OBSERVE AGAIN · WE ADD ONLY WHAT IS NECESSARY.
PC-11-B-En — PERSONAL CONSTELLATIONS
Question:
WHAT APPEARS WHEN I OBSERVE MY DIFFERENT AGES AND THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN THEM?
And specifically in PC-11-En:
WHICH AGES, VOICES, OR LIFE STAGES PARTICIPATE IN THE EXPERIENCE OF “I’M STUCK”?
And:
WHAT HAPPENS BETWEEN THEM WHEN “I HAVE TO” APPEARS?
We do not assume that there is:
A GIRL WHO IS NOT ENOUGH
AN EXHAUSTED ADOLESCENT
A PERFECTIONISTIC YOUNG WOMAN
or:
AN ADULT WOMAN WHO HAS TO FIX THE OTHERS.
We observe.
What may appear is:
SENSATION · EMOTION · MOVEMENT · WORD · SILENCE.
We do not establish the order in advance.
Nor do we need all of them to appear.
WE ALLOW THE PHENOMENON TO EXPRESS ITSELF AS IT APPEARS.
The aim is not to eliminate:
DISCIPLINE · STRENGTH · RESPONSIBILITY · INTELLIGENCE · AMBITION · CAPACITY FOR WORK · DESIRE TO GROW.
It is to recover:
THE CAPACITY TO CHOOSE.
So that:
“I HAVE TO”
can stop being the only way of relating to what Nadia wants to do.
So that:
“I AM NOT ENOUGH”
can be observed as a conclusion and not necessarily as a description of who she is.
And so that:
“I’M STUCK”
no longer needs to occupy the same place in the relationship between the different stages of her life.
Perhaps the movement may come closer to:
“WHAT DO I WANT?”
“WHAT DO I NEED?”
“WHAT DO I CHOOSE?”
But we do not need to decide that before we begin.
Because in Personal Constellations too: